The First "Talk" with EK

No... not the birds and bees.

Something these two beautiful princesses have in common...

The "Talk" I have anxiously dreaded...

worried how I would ever eloquently explain...

how they came to live in an orphanage

and then became our precious daughters.

What "Talk" you ask...

the "Birth mother Talk".

Why so worried? Why such a big deal?

I have been the only mama EK has ever known

and always wanted to be the only one~

but there is another...

one she will never know,

one I can tell her nothing about,

one who for a reason unknown abandoned her,

a birth mother somewhere in China.

There was one day not too long ago

when I thought our conversation was leading to this Talk

but was not to be until yesterday.

We were at the cardiologist for SJ's monthly checkup

and while waiting for the dr and an echo~

EK picked up a book about the human body.

We looked through the book page by page...

she asking lots of questions

and me answering as many as I could.

We came to a page with a baby inside a mom.

EK looked at me and asked if that was how babies grew

and I said yes... (my heart beating out of my chest)...

I knew where this was going

and began praying for just the words God would have me say.

EK: And I grew in you?

(I pulled her into my lap so she would feel secure)

Me: Actually you and Jing did not grow inside my tummy.

You grew in a China mother's tummy.

She is called your birth mother.

I don't know anything about her

but she was not able to be your mama

so you went to live at the orphanage

so I could come to China and get you.

(EK just sat there very serious taking it all in, processing)

That was it.

I asked her if she wanted to ask me anything else~

she said no.

I believe it was perfect timing for us to open the convo

and I know there will be many more...

I will continue to pray God will lead me ever so gently

and the girls' hearts to be willing to take it in.

I'm SO thankful they will have each other

to talk with, cry with, and be with!

It amazes me that we have read

I Love You Like Crazy Cakes

SO many times but EK has never asked

why all the babies were there

OR

how she came to be in an orphanage.

In her little mind,

that's just the way it was.

She lived in the orphanage with her nannies

and we prayed for her

and God allowed us to come to China to get her.

She's always known she was adopted.

Now she has another piece of her story~

one she will have to process in her own way.

One that I will spend my whole life praying about...

one that I will always be grateful for

because two birth mothers far away in China

chose life for my two precious daughters

and I get to be their Forever Mama!

Forever I will love them like crazy cakes!!!

PS! The cardiologist said SJ's pulmonary arteries have grown

1 mm since last appt and that is significant.

Her heart is stronger and healthier

and for that,

we are eternally grateful!!!

Proverbs 4:23 NIV

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life.